vacuum of legitimacy: April 2008

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

It was being installed on their car.

go quote this one

If Holden Caulfield were to give Haverford High School's commencement speech....

You're all a bunch of goddam phonies.

Leanne's head.

And you know, America isn't really a melting pot, but a...

Monday, April 28, 2008

Coming in at number 3:: Alex's lemonade stand!

see if you can do better http://www.joystiq.com/media/2006/10/mii.swf

Ms. Cyrus had a different view in a prepared statement released on Sunday:

“I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be ‘artistic’ and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed. I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed. I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

so embarrassed. I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about.”

deeply about.”

because apparently the blogosphere is going crazy about this.

Girls are laugh at you.

SUBJECT: Wanna your girl cum 3 or times during the night?‏

BODY:
Feel shy because of your penis size.

Girls are laugh at you.

Don't upset we know how to change your sexual life.

Today we are glad to offer you new penis enlargement method.

Do not loose time do it right now.

Bomb her womb with your massive man cannon

Sunday, April 27, 2008

moosey0418 (10:17:27 PM): hahah this is something i would put on the blog...

Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
Cheer and clap loudly every time someoe brekas the silence w/ a bodily function noise.
Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free."
Drop a marble and say, "Oh shit! My glass eye!"
Fill a balloon w/ creamed corn. Rush into the stall w/ your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettuccine alfredo you had for breakfast.
Fill up a large flask w/ Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!"
Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 ft. Sigh relaxingly.
Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peekaboo!"
Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot."
Say, "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!"
Say, "Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"
Say, "Damn, this water's cold."
Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."
Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."
Say, "Interesting...more floaters than sinkers."
Say, "Now how did that get there?"
Say, "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that."
Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"
Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could
you kick that back over here please?"

tomdangerrogers (9:42:35 PM): so you took it down?

"FUCK!"
"is there cinnamon in this? it definitely tastes like cinnamon. I SWEAR theres cinnamon in this!"
"WHY have the gods forsaken me?"
"oh. my. god."
Cobb giving us the lecture on how eating in his class is disrespectful and about 15 seconds later me tossing a wawa bottle into the trashcan...or something like that
The mix cheating on the final with a pen up his sleeve
julia margolis's mom's nipples...you could cut glass with them things
i've got bad social skills cause im an only child
tom rogers abandoneding the CREW to do some queer cooking thing "cuz its just gonna be easier this way"
jeremy wearing the pants in his final proj

Saturday, April 26, 2008

home, sweet home

List of Lessons Learned From Office Rivieri

Don't Get Defense with me son because you could be spending some time in juvenile
You’re not allowed to ride your skateboards down here. NOWHERE.
I’m not you’re father. You give that attitude to your father. You give that attitude to me, I’ll smack you upside your head.
SHUT YOUR MOUTH I’M TALKING
Sit down. I’M NOT A DUDE
You call me dude one more time.
First of all you disrespected me THIS BADGE and MY department
When I’m talking to you - you shut your mouth, you listen.
You don’t understand the meaning of RESPECT
I’m NOT man. I’m NOT dude. I AM OFFICER RIVIERI
1. The sooner you learn that, the longer you’re gonna live in this world.
2. Somebody’s gonna kill you.
Do you go to school and give your teacher this kinda lip? Do you backtalk your teacher? _Then what makes you think you can do it to a police officer?
Stop Calling me dude.
A dude is somebody who works on a ranch
Your friends got brains, they know when to shut up. You just keep FLAPPIN’
You got that camera on? If I find myself on…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GgWrV8TcUc

Friday, April 25, 2008

this is why you shouldn't smoke

also, having that asian lady's scream playing very loudly while there was a cosumter in line is pretty awkward...

enjoicostarica (3:17:27 PM): holyyyyyyy

Thursday, April 24, 2008

you know it

I saw well why the gods do not speak openly, nor let us answer. Till that need can be dug out of us, why should they hear the babble that we think we

mean? How can they meet us face to face till we have faces?

If you haven't checked out Mr. Show on HBO you should.

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=mr+show&search_type=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N__UBXS_o7U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtE1HnIU6q8

One more year, one more year, one more year

If you thought clockin' dollars was the shit

http://www.birkoph.com/Wolf_tshirt.htm

is away at 10:33:53 PM.

I AM IRONMAN (den ne ne neh neh ne)

Updates

attempts to reach david hasselhoff for a performance at graduation (or during the school year?) have stalled. His official website ( http://hasselhoff.com/ ) provides no contact information.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wise old man.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judgment_of_Solomon

K: How am I to tell who really is the mother of this baby?
M: I am; he looks like me.
N: No, he looks even more like me. The baby is mine.
K: I shall cut the baby in half and give each of you a half!
M: No, I would rather have her take the baby than to cut in half!
K: hahahah, I am so smart. I now know who the tru-
N: No, I agree. I wouuld rather have you give it to her than to cut the baby in half.
K: shit.

oh yeah ANDS ITS FUNNY CAUSE HER LAST NAME.

whoa, 4 stars!

http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051215/REVIEWS/51019006/1023

C: Who's back there?
J: Just me and my friend.
C: No, who's really back there?
J: I told you just the two of us.
C: Ok, you sure there isn't any girls?
J: No, just the two of us.
C: How bout another guy, at least? Seriously, just the two of you. So if I come in there I'll only find two dudes.
J: AND IS FUNNY CAUSE HER LAST NAME

I can post videos too...

....

Saturday, April 19, 2008

To stick with the city council theme... It's a cryin' shame

Ray Lyman needs to listen to the hoff

Friday, April 18, 2008

The Rules of Engagement will apply!

Taking a break

I shall be abstaining (courteously) from blogging for an extended period. I have experienced severe weight loss and gain as well as constantly being tired and having too much energy. To our blog readers going to jv prom: have fun. Stay away from bathrooms if you can...AND ITS FUNNY CAUSE HER LAST NAME.

peace, wb

Thursday, April 17, 2008

WANTED: Picture of Max (of Max's Minute)

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=13208
I made a picture of max, but i couldn't get it to upload. Hopefully I'll be able to upload it tomorrow.

Kicking it Backstage

Cash prize for whoever comes up with a good caption

The Office

Lets Hope it doesn't suck, again.

(Picture above is a picture of The Office that doesn't get worse and worse every week)

--

SlurSlurSlur (9:06:09 PM): ugh
m0lll lindleey (9:06:13 PM): hahaha will
m0lll lindleey (9:06:15 PM): what on earth is wrong
SlurSlurSlur (9:06:19 PM): im not even gonna bother watching anymore

Conversation Between C and Z

Z: Yeah, coach? What's up?
C: How you doing?
Z: Good, good. Just working on some pregame drills with the guys.
-Do you think I should maybe get back there?
C: Oh, them. They'll be fine without you for.
Z: Yeah, I know. I was just about to shoot, when you called me over, tho, but I figured you had something really really important to tell me or something.
C: Oh, I did. I do.

Rest Assured: He's not dead.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

AND ITS FUNNY CAUSE HER LAST NAME

Scene One
Inset: The young protagonist is sitting on his bed with a black cordless phone in his young protagonist right hand. My right, your left. Phone rings.

Man- Hello?

Woman- Hi, its Ms. Yach.

Man - Yes?

Woman- You didn't print that picture again?

Man- No

Woman- Ok, well someone found another one later in the day.

Man- Well, it wasn't me. It could have been a copy cat...

Woman- Could someone else have printed another one?

Man- I don't think so, I only had the one copy that you took.

Woman- Did you put it on a website?

Man- Um

Woman- Perhaps a blog?

Man- AND ITS FUNNY CAUSE HER LAST NAME.

---

New pic coming tommorow. You can't stop science, yo. Long live free speech such as , if you think about it IN AN ALEX WAY.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

The World Bible Banger Hall of Fame

A few inductees...

Martin Luther

Savanarola

Philip II of Spain

The State of Missouri

The 33rd Street Preachers

Fredryk Fox

Here it is... your moment of zen:

0.000001%*

To answer your question, Tom: No, I don't think VW reads the blog.

*Percent of Global Users who visit this site.
http://www.alexa.com/data/details/traffic_details/apgogo.blogspot.com

Monday, April 14, 2008

xx kimmmiie (9:31:36 PM): HAHAHA i just spent 5 minutes of my life reading that

The reason why
The reason why
The reason why, I had to die
did I bleed the blood of greed
what was my destiny

Do you think VW reads the blog?

Sunday, April 13, 2008

SlurSlurSlur (9:36:38 PM): its jsut a vid

SlurSlurSlur (9:05:42 PM): i speding too much time on this

At the hight of his popularity, Tino was one of the biggest musical acts. He was selling out Madison Square Garden with ease. Some said he was better than Michael Jackson.

But his popularity soon faded and he came on some very difficult financial times. He was forced to take a 9 - 5 job as a receptionist at a law firm.

Fed up with the monotony of the J-O-B bullcrap, Tino took to the streets. Its there he met Namond, Michael, Randy and Dookie. Tino's life took a turn for the worse as he fell deeper and deeper into "The Game"